Mid-Morning Snack Attack

Wheat Thins are boring, by design. What is a guy to do, when at work with a bunch of boring-ass W Thins?

Easy. Arrange the hell out of the stupid little things and hot snauce them up. Hot snauce the crap out of them.

red lobster


Here, I went for a crude lobster formation.

If you get a little crazy with said hot snauce, don’t worry. I spent the rest of my afternoon with a small red snauce stain on my yellow notepad. Either my co-workers failed to notice, or thought I was crazy and avoided a rambling culinary pep talk.

+1 Spicy

Hot Dog Sandwich

Worst idea I’ve had in quite some time…hot dog sandwich.

Here is how you make a retarded hot dog sandwich, in case you feel a need to wreck your guts, feed a prisoner, lose your job, etc.

1) Halve some h dogs.

2) Pan fry said h dogs.



3) Assemble sandwich.



I went for pickles and spicy brown mustard on my stupid sandwich. Feel free to dump whatever you have in the fridge on that sonofabitch…I don’t think it really matters.

Wrap-up: h dog sandwiches taste like fail.

2009: A Breakfast Odyssey

great...more retarded pictures of crackers


Mankind’s quest for the perfect breakfast is the theme of “2009: A Breakfast Odyssey”, a process that unfolds along a space-time continuum. We “pepper-sauce” our primordial past, and we “Triscuit-the-shit-out-of” a cosmic future. The powers of intuition thus become the doors of perception, in our ongoing collective journey.