Mid-Morning Snack Attack

Wheat Thins are boring, by design. What is a guy to do, when at work with a bunch of boring-ass W Thins?

Easy. Arrange the hell out of the stupid little things and hot snauce them up. Hot snauce the crap out of them.

red lobster

CHOMPCHOMPCHOMP

Here, I went for a crude lobster formation.

If you get a little crazy with said hot snauce, don’t worry. I spent the rest of my afternoon with a small red snauce stain on my yellow notepad. Either my co-workers failed to notice, or thought I was crazy and avoided a rambling culinary pep talk.

+1 Spicy

Meeting Robot | I Need This

Best idea of the week…a robot to attend your meetings.

right there

Robot Weenie is Better than Humanoid Weenie

From dailymail.co.uk

Fed up with attending endless meetings when you’d much rather be at home? Step forward the QB from Anybots – a robot who can go to the office for you.

Developed by Bob Christopher, the brainchild behind the Pleo dinosaurs, the cute looking robot is essentially a teleconferencing system on wheels.

The robot can alter its height from 3ft to 5.7ft and weighs 2.5st, with a main computer and several mini-computers on board. It has an LCD monitor mounted on its head which feeds a webcam image of the telecommuter.

It ‘sees’ via a 5MP video camera in one eye, and a lower resolution camera on the head that points downwards. It ‘hears’ via three microphones that feed audio to the telecommuter, and has high-quality speakers for audio in the other direction.

Alright, nicely played. This thing costs 15K, however. I’m pretty sure I could do the same damned thing with an HTC Incredible, broom, Arduino, and an electric wheelchair motor. I would need an area to put some tattoos and earbuds, however. And somehow mimic my general sense of ‘leave me alone before I effin snap’ to be fully effective/reflective of me in a meeting situation. And a strong odor of coffee…definitely need that.

How to Fix a Paper Cutter

I walked into my designated printer room at work today to find the paper cutter broken. What a tragedy, right? I have absolutely no idea why we need a paper cutter, let alone several paper cutters, at our software shop FWIW. Regardless, I took it upon myself to remedy the problem. Sleep tight, thy co-workers…rest assured that you can again transform 8.5″ x 11″ paper sheets into 8.25″ x 11″ paper sheets, thanks to my pro bono paper cutter fixing skills. Observe.

What You’ll Need:

*Broken Paper Cutter
*Tape (Scotch)

Steps:

1) Locate Point of Failure

You can see that this particular cutter has malfunctioned due to a broken cutting arm.

paper cutter

brokos

2) Procure a section of tape

(If you are unsure with what to do with the tape at this point, don’t worry…this will come into play in step 3)

paper cutter

tapos

3) Place tape section on the displaced cutting arm

fix

applyum

4) Place displaced cutting arm on cutting arm articulating housing; secure tape

paper cutter

fixdos

That’s that. Leave it in the printer room for the next idiot who actually uses a paper cutter…I bet bewilderment will ensue