How to Code

I snapped a picture of a coworker’s “script” he is working on utilizing the object libraries we develop. Apparently, I’ve been doing it all wrong.
How to code
1) PrtScn a bunch of stuff
2) Paste into MSPaint
3) Add giant headers for reference
4) Print
5) Highlight the shit out of stuff
6) Strike-out any redundancies stemming from poor MSPaint-ing
7) Break out the pink highlighter
8) Locate someone to do your job for you
9) Ship it

The Bozeman Bear Incident

Sunday morning, I popped around the side of our house and entered a crime scene…

bear in garbage

bear tracks in bozeman
bear tracker

bear paw print
lil guy

…after careful deliberation, I concluded that the garbage perpetrator was a bear.

That was sort of a cool story and the end of the road, until the Bozeman Daily Chronicle reported that “hunters [were] cited for killing [a] black bear with bow on South 3rd Avenue” on the same night our trash was raided.

They were ‘hunting’ two blocks from our fucking house. Our house is about a five iron away from campus.

Fortunately, they caught the ‘hunters,’ and the Chronicle found someone less idiotic to write the follow-up article.

At the end of it all, two MSU students stuck four arrows via compound bow into a black bear that most likely weighed less than they do, at a less-than-intimidating 150 lbs. They both pleaded guilty, and were each sentenced to eight days in jail. One was fined $2700, the other $2500…hunting privileges revoked for 5 and 3.5 years respectively.

At least the guys didn’t fight the charges. It was a dangerous, asshole maneuver to pull the stunt in the first place, but they pleaded guilty and got it over with. The worst part of the whole thing may have been the bear’s choice of last meal. If he would have gone with our other dumpster, he would have found himself neck-deep in leftover Chinese, Mexican, and spare ribs. Could have gone out with a bang…

Black Monday 2011

I finally gathered my nerves and opened my TDAmeritrade account after the market closed. Pretty ugly.

stock crash

If the dollar wasn’t jacked, I would be in buy mode. As it stands, I’m staying put. Sure glad I am not a soon-to-be retiree; things could be bleaker.

Here’s to a rebound…

World’s Greatest Search Term

Tearing through my server logs, I have encountered the best search term in the world.

nasa discovers new life in your butt
what what

I sure hope that the searcher found what he or she was looking for. In your butt.

Man Lamp

My light needs were not being met in the lab. Garage, lab, whatever. Anyhow, I picked up a halogen work light at the hardware store, thinking that the base dimensions and output would make for a perfect movable lab light source.

This thing is a monster. Check this out.

Reference voltage:

base voltage
less than 1 point 21 gigawatts

Reference tempurature

+1 tepid

Voltage with 40W light bulb:

better now

Voltage with Man-Lamp: (maxed out)


Wait for it…wait for it…wait for it…TEMP NEAR MAN-LAMP

what the fuck is this thing

Incredible. I guess this could double as a goddamned heater. My digital thermo was still climbing at 145. FWIW, it is perfect for the lab. Just sort of confusing how brutish it is. Impressive.

NASA Finds New Life?

T minus 2.75 hours until NASA hits the stage to talk about a newly discovered life-form.

nanu nanu
nanu nanu

Stay tuned…this is a good day.

Are Pajama Jeans Awesome?

Remember Pajama Jeans? I posted about them a while back, stating that society had hit a new low, due to the sheer level of WTF of which Pajama Jeans reek. Even sexy robot lady can’t make these look less than WTF.

pj jean
creepy robot lady is still sexy, creepy

Well, I can’t tell you if people are still making these things. I too can’t tell you if people are still buying or wearing Pajama Jeans.

I can say, with 100% certainty, that people are searching the webs for these retarded things…and en masse. Check the snapshot from Google Webmaster Tools:

no way

Un. Fricking. Believable.

Well, I do get a kick out of the fact the Pajama Jeans would-be shoppers ended up here. I have a feeling they would appreciate the last post about the junk food in my desk drawer at work.